Living Large

I once was on a plane (in my smaller days) and I heard a man calling out from the back, "My wife needs a seat-belt extender!" I thought "there are so many things wrong with that statement." First of all, what the heck is a seat-belt extender? Second, shouldn't he be asking for one more quietly? and third, why isn't his wife choking him to death for asking for one?

OK. If I ever do need a seat belt extender (if I don't breathe for a minute, I can still get it buckled!), I certainly wouldn't ask my husband to get one for me. Also, how important is a seat belt on an airplane anyway? Not important enough to be humiliated while a teeny tiny flight attendant goes to look for one. Possibly asking her co-workers, gesturing in my direction as she explains my request. No thank you. If the plane does go down, I'd rather die not strapped to my seat. Maybe they would find me tossed from the fuselage in some body of water and assume I am bloated... not just too fat for the seat belt and too proud to ask for a seat-belt extender.

So I know they make you buckle on planes but really... what flight attendant is going to risk me flipping out on her (or him) and demanding more than my fair share of the "in-flight snack" as recompense for suggesting that it is absolutely imperative that I am buckled nice and tight? And anyway, it's not as if there is a lot of room for me to go bouncing around the plane. I mean, come on, when I sit down I am wedged in there pretty good.

This post is bordering on ranting so I'll stop.

Big Girl